Most couples don't dislike being photographed — they dislike being asked to stand still and perform. The moment someone says "chin down, hand there, look at me and smile", the shoulders rise, the jaw tightens and the easy affection you have at home quietly disappears. Your photographer knows this too. That's why the loveliest natural portraits are rarely portraits at all; they're moments borrowed from a walk, a joke or a whispered conversation while you were busy being a couple.
The good news is that natural images don't demand acting skills. They ask for movement, a little distraction and light that suits the place you've chosen. Here's how to make all three work for you.
Walking is the single most reliable way to look relaxed. Bodies in motion settle into natural shapes on their own — arms swing, hips move, hands find something to do. Standing still, by contrast, makes almost everyone feel like a shop mannequin.
Ask your photographer to shoot from behind and from the side as well as the front. Some of the most treasured frames are the ones where you're not looking at the lens at all — just two people heading somewhere together.
Direction works far better than posing. A photographer who says "tell each other about the worst meal you've ever had" will get genuine laughter; one who says "look happy" will get grimaces. If your photographer is quiet, you can run the prompts yourselves — you'll both relax into it within a minute or two.
Try not to perform for the camera. Talk quietly, look at each other, and let the photographer work around you. If it helps, think of it as a private conversation you happen to be having in a nice location, with someone quietly documenting it from a distance.
Hands are the giveaway in stiff photographs. Clenched fists, splayed fingers and the dreaded limp-wristed handshake all shout "I don't know what to do with myself". Give your hands a job instead.
Keep your weight on your back foot rather than both feet square, and turn your body very slightly away from the lens. It slims the silhouette and stops you facing the camera head-on like a passport photo.
British light is more forgiving than we give it credit for, but timing matters enormously. Golden hour in June can fall around eight or nine in the evening; in December you might be looking at half past two in the afternoon. Ask your photographer to plan the portrait slot around the light rather than squeezing it in after the speeches.
Rain isn't the enemy either. A clear umbrella, a shop doorway or simply standing under a large tree can produce atmospheric images that sun-drenched couples never get. If your venue has a covered walkway or a glasshouse, keep it in reserve.
Thirty to forty-five minutes of portraits is usually plenty; longer than that and the energy dips. Plan a comfortable route — ideally a loop rather than an out-and-back, so you're always seeing something new and your photographer has fresh backdrops.
Finally, tell your photographer what you actually like. If you've seen images where couples are laughing rather than looking at the lens, say so. If you'd rather have a handful of calm, quiet frames than fifty energetic ones, say that too. The more they understand how you two are together, the less they'll need to direct — and the more your photographs will simply look like you, on a very good day.